You Deserve Nothing

You deserve nothing. That’s right. You, ya little snowflake. You deserve nothing. No one does. If you think you do, or someone tells you that, it is a massive, vicious lie. Now this is not to say that rewards do not have their place. They certainly do. But you do not “deserve” them. They are earned. There’s a difference.

This begins with goal setting. You set an attainable goal for yourself. You think up a feasible plan (feasible being the operative word). You then need to set little goals along the way to track progress. This is important!! You NEED to have those little goals. You need to track your progress. So let’s say your goal is to lose weight and you’d like to be down 30 pounds. Great! Each 10 is a small goal. Or maybe each 5. Or maybe each time you go down a pants/dress size you see that as a small goal and a tiny victory. You still don’t deserve that fancy Starbucks drink. I am not here to piss in your cornflakes. Rewarding yourself for a job well done on the way to that big goal is good. In fact, I think it’s vital. But don’t sabotage your own damn progress. It makes me sick to my damn stomach when someone finishes a hard workout or goes a week of clean eating and decides they “deserve” a cheat meal. That’s BULLSHIT! You most certainly do not! You wanna buy yourself a new outfit that fits you better, go for it. You wanna go out for a nice meal instead of cook provided you’re staying within your dietary parameters? Awesome (I like to take cooking breaks too)! But don’t say you deserve it. And don’t go off the deep end of stuffing your gullet with everything you’ve been craving.

A goal has to be worked at EVERY day. Relentlessly. You’re not going to change or improve your situation by settling. One of my favorite quotes by Dr. Phil is “The difference between you and those you envy is that you settled for less.” Don’t settle. Ever! You’re worth a lot more than that. You may not think you are, but you most certainly are. You won’t get to that point by sitting on your ass waiting for your ship to come in or you’re opportunity to fall in your lap. You don’t deserve that. You can’t daydream your goals into reality. There has to be a plan. You have to work at that plan each and every day. It’s a choice. You have to choose to work at it and be diligent in your pursuit.

There will be quiet times. Times where you simply have to sit and wait on someone else to do their part to make the pieces fall together. It fucking SUCKS but that’s reality.  Remember that people on the whole are stupid. Individuals are smart and can think for themselves so it’s up to you to surround yourself with people who support your goal and are willing to help you along the way. That way, when the quiet hits, you can lean on faith to get you through. Faith is not such an easy thing and is not limited to the religious connotation. You must have faith in yourself and a little faith in humanity as well. People, in general, will let you down and shit on your progress. See the world doesn’t want you to win. They want you to fail and flounder. There are individuals in this world, however, that love you. There are those willing to bend over backwards and want nothing more to see you succeed. These are the folks who will support your faith in humanity and believe you deserve whatever goal you’re fighting for.

There’s that word again...deserve. Now others may believe you deserve something. Hell, they may even jump start or accelerate your progress because of it! This is all well and good provided you know exactly what it is. Your friend’s simply being an awesome human! Don’t let this go to your head. You most certainly do NOT deserve it, but they believe you do and that’s what’s important. Your hard work being recognized by the outside world. Sometimes help will come out of nowhere from an unexpected source. This is even better! It means your plan is working. You still don’t deserve it.

The only thing you really DESERVE is the right to life. Liberty and the pursuit of happiness (the latter no longer found in the constitution) is not a right. It’s something you have to work at. Gary Vaynerchuk (look him up if you don’t already know) said something poignant the other day and that is “Get used to eating dirt….love the dirt.” What he means is, don’t ever be above it. Remember where you came from. The dirt is where your roots are sown. Dirt is your friend. Don’t be afraid to eat dirt. Start at the bottom. Suffer! Suffering and pain builds character. It will be worth it. Eat the pain too. When it’s gone you’ll feel alive. See there are two types of people in this world: Those willing to suffer and those who want to feel good all the time. Life ain’t kind. You must be willing to suffer. It makes the feel good times all the sweeter. Your suffering will have purpose though. The dirt won’t always taste so bad. There are worse things than dirt. TRUST ME! And you can end up eating shit if you’re not careful. So be mindful of that. Be mindful of your choices, fully conscious and aware of them at all times. Take out the trash, make the coffee, eat the dirt and never be above it. You’re not. You don’t deserve it. You deserve NOTHING!

Stay humble. Stay on your hustle. Never give in. Never relent. You’ll earn it.

Carrie Giordano